In Defense of the Glorious Fanny Pack

Fanny packs rock. You read me. I’d say it louder if my editors enable me use greater fonts.

Apparently, in that time period between when fanny packs were being well-known and their subsequent waning, I was asleep. It seemed to happen so promptly. Just like three-piece suits. Really don’t get me started off on why three-piece satisfies should really never have absent out of design.

The detail is, I have by no means cared for carrying matters in my pockets, entrance or again. It’s not like I at any time had a great deal of revenue to make my wallet bulky. Without receiving too particular, I just don’t treatment to have anything at all in my again pocket to make sitting down not comfortable.

So when I’m at Walt Disney Earth roaming the parks, and it is warm, I don’t need matters accumulating in my pockets to make me even much more sweaty. Cue the fanny pack.

From what I’ve figured out (if you consider the Interwebs), fanny packs seem to date back again to medieval periods. They ended up a practical resolution for the reason that the clothes worn all through these occasions didn’t have pockets. They were being a handy style accent.

Speedy ahead to 1954 where the fanny pack appeared as a mail order item at Xmas time in New England. Encouraged by kangaroo pouches, fanny packs appear to have produced their style entrance in 1962. It is now mentioned that there has been a resurgence. I do not have to have a resurgence to know what stands the examination of time.

Relying on the place you are from, they go by distinct names. Folks in the States normally use the expression “fanny pack,” but close to the environment it can be recognized as a “bumbag,” “waist bag,” “belt bag,” “moon bag,” “belly bag,” or as stylish New York Metropolis trendsetter Ted Mosby coined the expression: “hands-absolutely free waistline satchel.”

I admit to proudly owning at minimum a few, but I use only a person when I’m at Walt Disney Planet (see photo higher than).

I put on mine about the midsection but have it positioned in the entrance for less difficult access. That is the beauty of this multipurpose accessory: Use it in the front for uncomplicated accessibility and spin it close to to the back when a ride necessitates a seatbelt. So technically I use it much more as a stomach bag, but for the sake of this posting I will use the substantially maligned and oft ridiculed “fanny pack.” But for 180 levels, they’re the identical thing. And you can convert them 90 levels (on the hip) when likely by means of slim areas and tight squeezes like turnstiles and Disney Right after Several hours Boo Bash.

So not only are they fashionable and adaptable, you can carry stuff in them. Which can make you extremely self-enough and ever-all set. It’s like a beneficial cummerbund. Here’s a listing of the things I commonly carry in my fanny pack:

  • Masks (ideally for not way too a lot for a longer period)
  • Eyeglasses (for examining or sun)
  • Vehicle keys/fobs
  • Wallet
  • Cash and coin (you by no means know)
  • Smartphone
  • Ticket playing cards on outings with out MagicBands

Also, maps are important to me. My father experienced this uncanny way of generally knowing which way was North. And if you know exactly where North is, all the other directions are quite effortless to figure out. Not me. I got the Directionally-Challenged gene from my mother.

I’m also not good at spatial perspective. If I’m looking at that Yak & Yeti Cafe is on my still left, but on my map it is on my correct, I have to rotate the map so anything is upside down, just so I know which path to walk. Thanks, Mother.

I also dig out the map commonly. When a family members member needs to see an attraction, it’s my obligation to get them to it. Which will make the map nicely-applied. The way I go by way of a map, it would never ever survive in my pocket. It hardly survives in my fanny pack. Which is why I carry extras. I like to commence my day with 3.

Photographic Proof

Let us get back to the trend statement. I’m generally on the back again-conclusion of reputation of a trend piece and on the front-conclusion of its resurgence (translation: I usually find myself between vogue tendencies). So for several years I’d put on my fanny pack despite its dwindling presence in the parks. But which is the thing. There was a time in my life when I cared what other persons assumed of me. That consists of my very own spouse and children. That time has extended passed.

And just so you know, if you are a person of all those fashionistas who requires a flawlessly excellent fanny pack and slings it in excess of a shoulder like Joe’s saddle bag in A Fistful of Pounds, we in the fanny pack group have a person detail to say: nope. We refer to you as a “fanny phony.”

If you like fanny packs but aren’t completely ready to display screen them boldly, you can conceal them underneath your shirt. It makes you glimpse like you have a tummy on you, but which is okay. It will take time. We’ll wait for you.

Bottom line in all of this? Put on what you want. You’re in the Disney Bubble and you need to delight in each component of it. And those people that try to disparage you for your decisions never belong in the Bubble. They are occupying a room in the Bubble that they really don’t are worthy of and need to go away.

So be a part of us. We are the Fanny Pack Nation. We’re proud and courageous and unapologetic. Join us as we journey arm-in-arm into the parks, impervious to ridicule, disregarding the nay-sayers and defying the Garment District. To be timeless like the fanny pack alone: unaffected by what is trending.

And if you ought to worry about losing your way, you needn’t. Due to the fact I’ll have a map. 3, in simple fact.